Alyssa Mercante Put the Fries in the Bag Video
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Put the Fries in the Bag – The Alyssa Mercante Song

More Satirical Funsies in the Form of a Music Video Well, it happened again - I got bored and a video got made. This time,  the spotlight’s on Alyssa Mercante - ex-Kotaku editor, professional victim, and now the star of my musical roast that nobody asked for (but I had way too much free time to make). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1U337S8CbI Video: Put the Fries in the Bag - The Alyssa Mercante Song | ReportAFK Following up my songs about Hasan and Ludwig (embedded below), I figured it was only fair Alyssa got her own theme music too. Edgy, satirical, and about as subtle as a drive-thru speaker at 2AM, this was pretty fun to make ngl. Chorus TL;DR: Put the fries in the bag Moral of the story: Don’t start drama if you can’t handle the receipts. If you like this kind […]

Alyssa Mercante Cope Olympics Bad at Gaming
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The Cope Olympics: Why Gaming Journos Can’t Admit They’re Mid

When I came across Alyssa Mercante’s recent article on Marvel Rivals at GameSpot, I honestly didn't know what I would be stepping into. I wasn't prepared to take the kamehama to the face in the form of roughly 1,100 words of pure and unadulterated cope.Her article, “Marvel Rivals Made Me Quit Competitive Gaming”, isn’t really about Marvel Rivals at all. It’s about how one failed ex-Kotaku editor decided that losses in a free-to-play competitive game weren’t her fault, but the system’s.This is the kind of mental gymnastics that has become invasive in modern gaming journalism. Rather than looking in the mirror and admitting, “hey, maybe I’m just mid,” writers like Alyssa weave elaborate narratives about toxic communities, unfair matchmaking, or oppressive design choices.But really, this is just the Dunning-Kruger Effect and self-serving bias dressed up as content. Dunning-Kruger and the Self-Serving […]

The Rise of Fear and Anime Activism
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Lost in Translation: The Rise of Using Fear and Anime Activism

Caution: Ideology Ahead! How Activists Have Invaded Your Anime You know what I want when I go looking up anime conventions? A list of dates, times, and maybe a map so I don’t end up in the wrong ballroom with a bunch of sweaty Pokémon card traders. You know what I don't want? A fear-mongering disclaimer straight out of a freshman sociology seminar warning me not to come to America because *gasp* the “current political climate” is just too scary! Liberal Activists Using Fear in Anime That’s exactly what greets you on certain convention-listing sites like AnimeCons and FanCons, which decided that before you even look up a schedule, you first need a lecture about how unsafe the U.S. is. Image: Anime Convention Sites Warn Against U.S. Travel | FanCons | AnimeCons Their disclaimer points readers to a MSN roundup of […]

The War on Online Privacy KOSA Kids Online Safety Act
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The War on Online Privacy: Act Now Before It’s Too Late

How Age Verification Is Eating the Internet Remember the internet before the ID checks, biometric scans, and "prove-you’re-over-18" pop-ups? Yeah, me neither. What used to be a place for memes, chaos, and unfiltered creativity is now fast turning into a high-tech playground where every click, every swipe, and every login is being watched, logged, and verified. And let’s be real: this isn’t just about “protecting kids” or “keeping content safe.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXoe6s4CF7A Video: The Kids Online Safety Act (KOSA) is a Dumpster Fire | ChiefGYK3D This is a full-on land grab of our digital anonymity, packaged in a warm, emotional wrapper so convincing you won’t even notice until it’s too late. Safety Tech: The Internet’s New Bouncers Meet the new gatekeepers: companies like Yoti, Jumio, Veriff, Onfido, and Entrust. These are the digital bouncers of the internet, checking IDs, scanning faces, […]

Tales of the Shire and Sweet Baby Inc Fails
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Tales of the Shire and 9 Other Sweet Baby Inc. Flops to Avoid

Tales of the Shire Trips Over Its Own Hairy Feet and 9 Other Sweet Baby Inc. Flops If you’ve been anywhere near gaming news this week, you’ve probably heard the soft thud of Tales of the Shire hitting the market - and then promptly falling into the compost heap behind Mordor. What was supposed to be a cozy, heartwarming Hobbit life sim has turned into yet another cautionary tale in the saga of Sweet Baby Inc. (SBI) involvement in modern gaming. PSA Reminder: Sweet Baby Inc. For the uninitiated, Sweet Baby Inc. is a Canadian "narrative consultancy" led by Kim Belair that claims to want to help studios tell better stories through inorganic heaps of diversity, equity, and inclusion...hard pass. But to gamers who haven't been sipping on the leftist propaganda Kool-Aid, their influence has become a scarlet letter: you […]

What Happened to Sonic EXE TD Reborn
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TD Reborn Is Dead, But rEXEcution Is Getting Ready to Jump In

TD Reborn is Canceled But a New Game is in the Works Welp. It happened. Like I said it would.TD Reborn is officially toast. After mounting drama, shady monetization moves, and a full-on mod revolt, Sonic.EXE: The Disaster Reborn has been shut down - presumably before SEGA even had to send their usual love letter like they did with the original Sonic.EXE: The Disaster on Roblox. And while fans are still sifting through the wreckage of the Discord fallout, something unexpected has already emerged from the ashes: Gameripper is back! And apparently he's been quietly rebuilding the entire thing for months. In a long-awaited statement to the community, Gameripper665 confirmed that not only were the AI rumors bogus (it helped clean two scripts, not write the game), but that he’s been re-coding the project from the ground up "just for […]

Stop KOSA Kids Online Safety Act Internet Privacy
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The Kids Online Safety Act Is a Trojan Horse for Mass Surveillance

The War on Internet Privacy Disguised as “Protecting Kids” They’re at it again - like a bad sequel to a movie nobody asked for, the Kids Online Safety Act (S.1748) has clawed its way back into Congress. They’re calling it a “child safety” bill, but if you peek under the mask, it’s just another privacy-shredding, freedom-stomping piece of legislation that aims to turn the internet into a government-moderated daycare…for adults. So what is this legislative turd wrapped in a sparkly “think of the children” bow? Act 1: Same KOSA Script, New Fearmongering The Kids Online Safety Act (KOSA), introduced (again) by Senators Marsha Blackburn and Richard Blumenthal, claims to shield children from “harmful content” online. Sounds noble, right? Who wouldn’t want to protect kids from the brain-melting horrors of TikTok rabbit holes and late-night Discord servers? But that’s just the bait. […]

Hasan Piker Music Video Communist in a Gucci Bag
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Communist in a Gucci Bag | Hasan Piker Music Video

Communist in a Gucci Bag Music Video Roast Track Within 30 minutes of dropping this masterpiece on YouTube, it was flagged and taken down for allegedly violating the “Violent Criminal Organizations” policy - which, while kind of insulting, is also objectively hilarious. Apparently, dropping some AI bars about hypocrisy hits harder than we thought. The appeal was successful (because duh), and now the video lives on to mock another day. “Communist in a Gucci Bag” is a no-holds-barred roast of Twitch's favorite champagne socialist, Hasan Piker, a man who preaches class struggle from the comfort of a multi-million-dollar LA mansion while rocking designer drip and throwing tantrums when you question the grindset. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cA1R53s9wCI Video: He's a Communist in a Gucci Bag | Hasan Piker" | ReportAFK The inspiration is Hasan’s weirdly obsessive non-response to Nuxanor - badass Vtuber he refused to […]

Let's Up Those Numbers Ludwig Turns to Jellywig
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Let’s Up Those Numbers! | A Music Video for Ludwig’s L’s

There’s a fine line between being a people pleaser and being a spineless jellyfish and Ludwig “Jellywig” Ahgren has apparently decided to do a swan dive straight into the latter. For a guy who built his empire on bold moves and "creator-first content", Ludwig has developed a serious allergy to taking real stances. He never wants to offend, and always plays it safe unless the court of public opinion already ruled for him. So, why are people dragging Ludwig harder than Hasan drags down America? Let’s break it down with three choice Jellywig L’s that make the nickname hit harder than his milk toast responses. “Let’s Up Those Numbers!” - Beerio Kart 2025 Let’s start with the event that inspired our new banger: “Let’s Up Those Numbers! – Ode to Jellywig”, for no other reason besides the fact that I think […]

Reddit's War on Free Speech Bans Bias and Silencing Users
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Reddit’s War on Free Speech: Bans, Bias, and Silencing Users

Reddit’s Woke Mod Problem Is Killing the Platform Reddit used to be the “front page of the internet.” A glorious hub of memes, mods, and mayhem. A place where free speech (and let’s be honest, a lot of stupid comments) could thrive. But lately? It’s looking more like the gated community from Get Out, complete with ideological HOA Karens slapping bans on anyone who so much as blinks in the wrong subreddit. Let’s be real. Reddit moderation has always been a bit of a mess. But the political and ideological rot is now in full bloom, and the problem isn’t just annoying anymore. It’s actively destroying discussion, chasing away logic, and turning what were once lively gaming hubs into echo chambers policed by activist mods with God complexes. Banned for Breathing: Reddit’s Guilt by Association You might think getting banned […]

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